Thursday, January 19, 2017

It's like losing a best friend

Tomorrow we will lose our best friends. And we will gain a playground bully.

The sense of loss I'm feeling is overwhelming. I don't like feeling intense feelings. I tend to shove them down (super healthy, I know). But these feelings of loss and grief keep bubbling up. They have been since November. Never before have I felt the need to break down and cry so often.

Obama and his beautiful family will go on to live their lives (in California!!) and no doubt continue to leave their positive mark on the world. But by leaving office, part of them is dying. Part of me is dying.

That family is pure class.  That family is who I want to represent my country to the world.

Now my country will be represented by a two year old with a Twitter account.

So along with the feelings of loss and grief, I'm so incredibly embarrassed. And ashamed.

Where do we go from here? Psychologists will tell you to acknowledge your feelings so you can move on. But I'm not sure I want to move on. I need to figure out how to use these feelings and fight.

I will not go gentle into that good night.